Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda…

Written by Easter Becker-Smith. Posted in Uncategorized

Published on July 28, 2010 with No Comments

Want to Get Something Done this Summer? Don’t Think or Say This One Word

There are only a few weeks left of summer and still so much to do. What will you be able to pack into the next few weeks? The answer to that question is largely in the words you think and speak. When you think that you really should clean out the garage while the weather is warm, or you really should weed the side of the house, you probably will not do it.


When we think or say we should do something, it is because we are being influenced by others, such as friends, family and the media. The “should dos” in life are often what we put off and may never do. This is because there is just not enough motivation to get us going.

If you are thinking that you should clean out your garage, maybe it’s because whenever the neighbor kids across the street play outside, they always leave their garage door open. You see their neat and organized garage every time you walk out your front door. You sigh, marvel at how anyone could accomplish the feat of a tidy garage and think, “I really should clean out our garage.”

If you are looking through a gardening magazine and see gorgeous gardens, full of magnificent colors, overflowing blossoms triumphantly abounding everywhere, you may once again sigh and think, “I really should weed the side of our house.”

If however, you just bought a new car and love its shiny exterior and clean floor mats, you may decide that you really want to keep your car looking as good as possible this winter.  You really do not want another winter of scraping snow and ice before heading to work, either, and that means you want space in your garage to park your new car. Your thinking has now changed from, “I should do” to “I want to do.”

Your motivation is strong any time you have a real desire or a want to do something.  How about those weeds in the yard? If you are planning an outdoor party, or an open house, you will want to have the yard looking good. Now you have much more motivation to weed. It is still not something you look forward to doing, but you want to get it done. Maybe you will decide to hire those neighbor kids across the street to weed, or you will just do it yourself, but either way, you want those weeds gone.

Change your thinking from “I should” to “I want” to accomplish tasks or goals. You may need to find a motivating reason to want to do something you have been putting off. Having guests visit is a great way to get you in the mood to clean, pick up, or weed the garden. Maybe inviting your in-laws will be even more motivating to get things done around the house and yard.

Summer is the time to plan a barbecue and invite some friends over. Why not throw a small party to get you motivated to do some of those chores you have been putting off all summer? You will feel great after you get those nagging tasks done and you will enjoy having your friends or family over to relax and have fun. Haven’t you been saying, “We should get together sometime this summer?”

My grandmother used to tell me that her grandmother often said, “Sometime is the time that never comes”.  If you are combining “should” with “sometime,” then you really do not stand much of a chance of getting something accomplished.

Set a date and time for a get-together at your home, and see how much you want to get done before your friends or family arrive.  Change your “shoulds” to “wants” and enjoy the rewards.

Right now I should pay some bills and do some filing. It is a beautiful sunny summer day, not too humid, with a light breeze. I really want to go on the deck, stretch out on a chaise lounge and sip some delicious cold tropical ice tea. Hmm, what do you think I will end up doing?

Bio:  Easter Becker Smith provides coaching for individuals, groups and corporate teams.  She coaches individuals to help them discover their own path to balance and fulfillment in their lives.  She brings her years of experience in business as a highly regarded leader to help companies improve their productivity and efficiency by learning how to better communicate with each other. Visit her website at www.coacheaster.com.

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About Easter Becker-Smith

All opinions, conclusions or recommendations expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of The Chronicle. Easter Becker-Smith provides coaching for individuals, groups and corporate teams.  She coaches individuals to help them discover their own path to balance and fulfillment in their lives.  She brings her years of experience in business as a highly regarded leader to help companies improve their productivity and efficiency by learning how to better communicate with each other.  Visit her website at www.coacheaster.com.

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